The Seven Plagues of Egypt

Just call me Job. For the past month and a half I have had one thing or another and I have to point out it all started with trying to get into better shape.

I bought a Gazelle, which is a gliding thing with no electrical parts (just in case we end up back in the tipi). It's kinda like cross country skiing with out the skinny little skis to fall off of. I could have gotten a Nordic Track, and there are a lot of free ones on Craig's List, which should be a clue as to how much fun they are, but in all the times I've tried them I've injured myself. So, it's a Gazelle.

Now, maybe I should have gone slower or maybe all this was inevitable anyhow but, I got on that thing and went to town. Seven days later I found myself in the worst Fibromyalgia flare in the history of me. This was not only painful but pissed me off. I bought the Gazelle to help get into shape. To help alleviate pain. To help get strong and there I was flat on my back. A trip to the doctor and a prescription later I was on the way to recovery. Oh, and no Gazelling for 10 days. I did research, I contacted my physical therapist friend. I needed to start out slower on the exercise thing. WAY slower.

At day eight of my exercise ban, just when I was getting excited about getting back on and gliding into health, I got the flu. Again, flat on my back. Chest congestion, coughing, nausea, high fever, headache, skin hurting flu. That hung out for about a week. Then, well, you know, the monthly girl thing showed up.

Finally, eleven days and a ton of research ago I put on my exercise clothes, dialed ZZ Top into my IPod and got back on the horse or antelope if you will. I put in my ten, yes you heard that, ten minutes and stepped off. Okay, so it was going to be really slow, still, I did something. The next morning I woke up, at two in the morning, with abdominal pain.

A trip to the Walk-In Clinic at Sanford Health and a CT scan later showed I had diverticulitis. Antibiotics, 2500 mg a day of antibiotics, was prescribed as was a clear liquid diet for 48 hours, advance your diet as tolerated and eat plenty of fiber. I was out flat again. A week off work with no energy to do anything but watch Ice Road Truckers and when that was done start Ax Men on Netflix. One day into work. Then flat out for two days again. The antibiotics made me sick to my stomach and gave me a metallic taste in my mouth. I called MY doctor this time. Her nurse, god bless her she's my hero, said, and I quote "root beer". Root beer turns out to be the antidote for the nausea caused by the one antibiotic (Flagyl). In 24 hours I was feeling better!

Yesterday I woke up with "that little itch" down in the nether-parts. I zoomed to Walgreens before work and picked up the supplies. Later, in the day, as I had a few bites of a co-worker birthday cake I noticed my  tongue felt like fur. So did the roof of my mouth. I went to the lavatory, swished and stuck my tongue out. THRUSH!  I called my doctor. She called a prescription.

Today is my last day on antibiotics. I'm looking forward to feeling better. Still, I have this sense of what next? I said to Mike last night as we shook hands good night....oh wait let me digress a moment. Here are the avenues of pleasure that have been cut off to me: alcohol, food, sex, and now kissing because of the thrush. My knitting friends reminded me I still have that. So, as Mike and I shook hands good night I mentioned that at least I haven't had an allergic reaction to the medications. But today's not over. I'll keep you posted! In the meantime, just call me Job.

Peace,
Karen

PS: There may be a Gazelle posting in Craig's List Bemidji